A bit of my writing...

I've been posting about books and writing quite a bit lately and I thought I'd share a little bit of what I've been working on.

This is the latest draft of the first chapter of my book: Darkpark. (Formerly The Sultan's Secret.) It's a children's book so if the style seems a little childish, now you know why.

I'd be interested to hear what you all think.

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1) The Orphanage

The orphanage was a grey building without any grass in its courtyard or ivy on its walls. It had metal widows that were bad at keeping the heat in when it was cold and even worse at keeping the cool in when it was hot. A sign at the gate read, "The Children'’s Ranch of Reluctant Beauty,"” and not even the headmaster, Mr. Levine, pretended to know what it meant. The children simply called it "The House" and Mr. Levine called it "The Ranch".

Read more...

The knockout punch.

I've been thinking lately about what makes a story great for me. I've read a ton of books in my life and I plan to read many more. I've also seen quite a few movies and reluctantly plan to see a few more. But out of all those stories only a small percentage have stuck with me, the rest have sunk to various oblivious levels between "good" and "awful".

This is what I feel makes a story great: The emotional punch. If a story can't make me feel anything then it's not worth the time. Forget if it's artistic, cool, whatever. The stories that I love are those that get inside your heart and they don't leave you when the movie's over or the book's closed. You carry the characters around with you and they've become a part of who you are.

Here's a few examples:

East, by Edith Pattou
This book was well-written, good characters, dialogue, settings, etc. But the story never resonated. When I put it down, I was done.

Bottom line: Landed a few punches but no knockout.

But here's another book:

Ender's Game, by Orson Scott Card.
When I was a kid I went to summer camp every summer and no matter how much fun I had, I would always miss my Mom and Dad at night. Camp can be a scary place; there's bigger kids that tease you and tell dirty jokes, there's cool counselors that you'd do anything to hang out with, there's girls and when you're ten or eleven, living with girls in a forest for a week can be a very confusing experience. I think that camp is a lot like school but you don't have your home and parents to retreat to.

When I read Ender's Game all the feelings of summer camp come back to me. In the book, Ender is sent to battle school when he's six years old (they start military training young in the future) where he's trained for combat. But inside Ender, at night when he's laying in bed, he just wants to go back home to his sister, the only person who ever loved him.

I think that's why I'll never forget Ender's Game. It's not because the plot is so great (it is), and it's so exciting (it is) but it's because when I read it I become Ender. I'm back in my bunk at summer camp, missing my Mom and Dad and just wanting to go home. When Ender finds his sister Valentine in the game (if you've read the book you'll understand) it hits me in a place I can feel and that's when the story digs itself into my mind.

All my favorite stories are full of those moments:

• In The Last Battle the battle at the stable and then when Tirian steps through the stable to find the kings and queen of Narnia waiting for him. Actually just about every part of The Last Battle is an emotional ride, so I'll move on.


• The Neverending Story when Bastian gives the Childlike Empress a new name.


• Blade Runner when Roy is dying and says those beautiful lines: "I've seen things you wouldn't believe..."


• Revenge of the Sith from the start of the duel, straight to the end.


• The Dark Tower, the final scenes. It's such an incredible end to such a long journey. (The Dark Tower really illustrates my point because it's not the most well-plotted or, at times, coherently-written bit of work but that story is just an amazing emotional journey.)


• Fellowship of the Ring, when Gandalf falls in the Mines of Moria and in Return of the King when Frodo and Sam are climbing up Mount Doom.


• Peter Pan when Wendy grows up.


• Superman: Action Comics 1, when (don't laugh) Superman rescues Lois for the first time.


• Sense and Sensibility, when Hugh Grant confesses his love to Emma Thompson at the end. (Can I get sensitivity points for admitting this and being a guy?)


• A movie I watched just last night: On the Waterfront, when the priest makes his speech to the dock workers, "Christ is kneeling right next to you..."


• Magnolia, the whole cast sings "Wise Up" by Amiee Mann. If you've seen it you'll get it.

I could go on for quite a while but I think you get the point. It's the times when people start cheering or crying in movie theaters. All these stories become more than movies and books, they become a part of you. For me that's what makes the difference between good and great.

So what are your stories? What are the books/movies that hit you with a knockout punch that you won't forget? And what are the moments in those stories that resonate with you? Let's hear some of them.

Cool story

3 Researchers Rescued From Arctic Island

I wonder if it's easier to pray without ceasing when you're being stalked by polar bears?

Two bands to listen to

Imogen Heap
Weird name, great music. I first heard Imogen on the soundtrack to Garden State signing "Let Go" and I was hooked. Her voice is captivating and her range is amazing. She slides from low growl to a note at the top of the register so effortlessly that you hardly even notice.

You've probably heard her as the lead vocalist for Frou Frou, an electronic band that was featured on the Shrek 2 soundtrack singing the Bonnie Tyler classic "Hero". I'm not a huge fan of Frou Frou though. I'd definitely check out Imogen's solo work first.

Please, please do yourself a favor and click the link below. It's probably my favorite acapella song ever and it shows what a great voice Imogen has.

Listen to "Hide and Seek" by Imogen Heap

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The Format
There's some bands that have the amazing ability to bring you out of a bad mood. The Format is one of those bands. They are entirely un-pretentious, catchy and just plain happy. The lead singer has an excellent voice to boot.

Just check out the lyric to the song "On Your Porch":

Well my dad was sick and my mom she cared for him
Her love it nursed him back to life
And me i ran, I couldn't even look at him for fear I'd have to say goodbye

And as I start to leave he grabs me by the shoulder and he tells me
What's left to lose, you've done enough
And if you fail well then you fail but not to us
'Cause these last three years, I know they've been hard
But now its time to get out of the desert and into the sun
Even if its alone

Corny? Maybe, but it's a nice break from the obscure lyrics that every alternative band has to write nowadays.

If you're feeling up to it, do yourself another favor and click the link below. I guarantee that you'll be humming this tune.

Click here to listen to "The First Single" by The Format

The city by the bay

So as I said, me and Suzanne made a little trip to San Fran' over the past few days and we had a great time.

Instead of staying in the city we stayed in Alameda and took the ferry in to the Embarcadero. That was the way to go. One of the things I hate about the city is driving through it and most of all - trying to find a place to park. So we just rode the public transportation, which was an adventure all by itself.

A few fun things to share:

1. We should've just worn signs around our necks that read: WE ARE TOURISTS. We walked around, staring at everything, consulting our map, freezing in our summer clothes.


2. While we were trying to figure out a subway route to Golden Gate Park a large man who moments before had been yelling "F---ing A--hole" at the top of his lungs walked up to us wondering if we needed help finding our route. Not wanting to say no, we nodded. In a friendly manner he showed us the best route and then asked for a tip. Not wanting to good vibe to disappear we, of course, tipped him. The second we stepped away three police officers drug him away. Me and Suzanne looked at each other: "Did we cause that?" Sorry pal. Thanks for the directions, though.


3. Riding the busses was just fun but the subway was a little creepy.


4. We ate in a packed Chinese restaurant where we were the only white people and the only people speaking English. It was bizarre. It gave me a little taste of how a black person must feel in white, white Grass Valley. The food was great.


5. Aside from the food, I hate Chinatown. It's crowded, noisy, ugly and every store is selling the exact same junk.


6. Union Square is awesome.


7. For dinner we sat next to a family on vacation from France. I, of course, red them the riot act on the superiority of America and spit in their food. Actually they were very nice and we got to talk with them a little. It was strangely cute to hear little children speaking French.


8. Speaking of cute foreign accents, toddlers with English accents are adorable. Even if they are throwing a temper tantrum.


9. Alameda is a very cute little town.


10. Standing on the prow of a ferry watching the enormous city of San Francisco recede into the night makes me feel very romantic. It's just too bad that my constantly-freezing wife wouldn't brave the wind and I had to make out with a handrail.

Overall, it was a great weekend. And as always when I visit San Francisco, I'm sooooo glad that I don't live there. I'll take trees and mountains over skyscrapers, thank you.

And by the way, thanks, Mom and Dad, for watching the kids. You're the best!

Vacation the next few days...

Me and my lovely bride are taking a little trip to San Francisco for the next couple of days. We're leaving the kids with the grandparents and going to pretend like we're independent free-spirits. :-)

I won't be able to post but when I get back I do plan an in-depth update.

Cheers!

Anyone up for a riddle?

Who owns the fish?

I reccomend getting a piece of paper and a pen...